What I Have Learned
When I decided to commit to this year as a Doulos Discipleship student I knew it would not be easy. I was told it would be the hardest year of my life but also the most fulfilling. I have been stretched and shaken to my core. Ministering in this environment has forced me to my knees and brought me so incredibly close to Jesus. The life lessons I have learned this year have been invaluable and I am excited to see those lessons put into action when I am done with my time here.
When I first arrived I felt as if I had been thrown in the fire. I had left all of the comforts of home and now I was being rejected by the teens that I was there to help. The teens were struggling with heartache and pain. They would often take that pain out on me in ways that I had never experienced before. I would take their insults personally and condemn myself for not doing a better job. Thankfully Jesus has taught me over and over again that His grace was sufficient for me and that His power was made perfect in my weakness. I realized that my ministry in the Shelterwood Program was not about whether the kids liked me. I was reminded of the fact that Jesus was often persecuted for doing His Father’s will and that his job was not to gain the approval of man. These kids need the kind of love that deals with conflict in a healthy way.
This year has taught me to look past the superficial behavior of the teens and look deeper to see what issues they are really dealing with. Instead of getting frustrated by their behavior I learned how to have tough conversations and deal with conflict. Before I got here I pretty much avoided conflict at all costs. I am a people pleaser and want everybody to get along. In dealing with these kids I have seen the beauty of having those “tough” conversations. I have learned that discipleship is not something that happens quickly but it takes time and it means getting dirty with people and dealing with their inadequacies. In helping others, you see your own deficiencies and realize that life without Jesus has little meaning. Jesus gives me the ability and strength to love these kids. I have come to understand that I need to die to myself daily and let Him live His life through me. When I do this I can see these kids through His eyes and develop a love and a patience that I never could on my own. I am so thankful for what God has done this year and my hope is that what Paul said in Philippians 1:6 would be true for my life as well. “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
by Tripp Kerth
Hi, my name is Sarah and I'm a Doulos Discipleship student here at Shelterwood. I'm halfway through my year here at Doulos and the Lord has taught me a lot so far. This is not the easiest job, but I have grown in how to relate to people. The more I rely and trust in Jesus, the more He gives me what I need and blesses my work.
Another thing that I've been learning is patience and flexibility. The teens don't always do something the first time you ask, so patience and flexibility is something I've learned and am still learning daily. Jesus is also teaching me that His love is not just shown through His word. Community is a huge part of Christ here, not only with other big sisters but also with the teens and the staff. It's amazing the support you receive and the love that's shown through others. I am really enjoying my time at Shelterwood and look forward to what Jesus is going to show me in the last part of this year.
I think any guy with much camping experience will tell you that there’s really nothing like sitting around a campfire at night enjoying deep conversations. But how much greater is that experience when you get to be a big brother to those people, discussing life and staring into a slowly dying fire? Those are the kinds of experiences I treasure as a big brother. Every part of the canoe trip was exciting to me while we were driving down, pitching our tents, wading through the knee-deep creek hunting for crawdads, watching the fireflies at night lighting up like I had never seen before, and floating down the river trying to avoid getting my boat flipped by an overzealous little brother. I just genuinely enjoy being able to be barefoot for a couple days and getting some wet grass between my toes. Now I’m starting to worry that all this Missouri air is starting to get to me. It’s pretty amazing being able to take a bunch of guys from all different places out of their element and spend some time in nature and out of the artificial.
I remember waking up one morning and only half awake, I walked down to the fire and plopped down on a cooler. It was great just sitting there watching some guys cook our breakfast in a skillet on the fire. Actually, we accidentally left our spatula for the trip back home so we had to find the cleanest stick we could off the ground to stir the scrambled eggs. The little brothers would trickle in toward the fire and after a while they would reach for some breakfast and then eventually woke up enough to string whole words together. So we sat around the fire there again enjoying a slow morning, eating a hot breakfast, and spending time building relationships and telling stories. It’s genuinely a delight to be involved in something where this is considered my job. I love these moments in life and being able to be a part of someone else’s journey and getting the chance to help someone heal away from such negative influences is priceless.
I’ve actually spend my whole life growing up in the Ozarks so camping is almost second nature to me, but there’s always something special about climbing back into your bed when you get back. It’s like my dad used to say, his favorite part about eating ice cream is the cold glass of water afterward. Surprisingly, I think my favorite part of the canoe trip was coming back to the house with the guys. We all have the same bug bites, the same memories, and we all long for the same air conditioning. That’s when I feel really bonded with the little brothers. We shared a few days together outside of our comfort zone, taking in the elements but finally we’re back enjoying the fulfillment to our longing for safety and comfort. And as a big brother that is what brings me, far and above the greatest joy, to be able to provide the little brothers with a sense of safety and comfort.
